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This is the story of my personal experience with a YouTuber that goes by the name of Bryant Moreland, better by the pseudonym eatdatpussy445, or EDP445 for short. What can I say about Mr. Moreland? Well, nothing really. Various YouTubers and commentators have done this man justice, to the least of my knowledge. From what I am aware of is that Bryant Moreland, or eatdatpussy445is an avid sports enthusiast as well as a vlogger on YouTube, whom is very known for his short temper and his obnoxious behavior to which can be displayed on the videos he’s produced.

My brief and somewhat short-lived fascination of this particular individual started in early August of 2017 whereas I am about to start the school semester and I am attempting to force myself into slumber as part of a mandatory routine to which I have followed since the beginning of 2014. It all started on a particular Sunday morning or afternoon in a sense. I was scrolling through my phone and decided to look on YouTube after checking my Facebook, a habit I am trying to break. I stumbled across of video made by an avid YouTuber called ThatKidDouglas whom was accompanied by his friend and partner, Brendan. Together these two gentleman observed and commentated on one of EDP’s videos to which was a rant video where he goes on a tangent about his job as a security guard at the lumber yard. Both Douglas and Brendan were very adamant to call EDP out on his senseless drivel where they produce a number of interesting points. This is a very crucial factor as a content creator. It’s a necessity to give constructive criticism as a means to help someone improve; however Mr. EatDatPussy wouldn’t know about constructive criticism, let alone accepting any form of criticism if he had known about it. In said video, EDP spoke ill of his fellow employers whom have repeatedly instructed him to remove his headphones while on the job. This ordeal did not bode well for EDP. Because, in this exact same video, EDP would shoot his mouth, spewing senseless banter consisting of lewd, obnoxious vulgarity followed by a few ethnic slurs, namely the N word. Another video was produced by ThatKidDouglas and Brendan which served as a follow-up to EDP’s previous video. Much similar to the last video, the duo would critique and commentate on EDP’s shenanigans pertaining to his failed attempts at finding steady employment. Again this behemoth would shoot his mouth off, hating on the manager who was just seemed a bit disgusted by EDP’s lack of formal attire for a job interview. He tries to explain to said manager that he just out of the gym and he didn’t have time to change into a suit and tie, which is not always necessary for a job interview.  Again, the Dynamic Duo had to call EDP out on his senseless idiocy throughout the entirety of the video. A third video was produced prior to the day EDP had his YouTube account suspended. This video was filmed on location at EDP’s place of occupation, which happens to be another security guard position at a local shopping center. At the beginning of the video, EDP went into full details of his restroom endeavors followed by his brief announcement of him unleashing a slight fart, to which Brendan and Douglas had to once again call him out for his obnoxious behavior as well as lack of decency. The latter of this video was just EDP ranting about a bunch of rambunctious teenagers which resulted in a conflict. He then shows little to no regard on the individuals age, stating that he would not hesitate to “throw hands with a 13-year-old.” This was proven to be another abject failure on the behalf of the leviathan that is known as EatDatPussy445.

Most of the videos EDP posted pertains to his undying devotion to the Philadelphia Eagles, but it’s his attitude towards their horrendous season that makes him an easy target for trollbait. EDP is known for raging against the casualties of the current football seasons whereas he curses out whomever is to blame for the outcome of the games. Based on the content in his videos, it’s become apparent that EDP is not too modest about his passions, given the circumstances of his behavior towards his detractors; mainly, his statements are flawed and illogical.

Recently, I got word that EDP had his channel allegedly terminated in mid-July and the culprit was a fellow YouTuber that goes by the name Mr. Sauce, whom has claimed to have had a beef with EatDatPussy for about some time. I’m not sure if this is true or not but I wouldn’t put it past him. Before this time, I’ve managed to find a number of roast compilations of EDP’s crazy shenanigans and I must say the content he’s produced would have been so hilarious had they not been so tragic. Don’t get me wrong, I was laughing uncontrollably as I viewed almost all five roast compilations. In one particular video, EDP addressed his abject hatred toward the fans of the Dallas Cowboys by pulling down his pants only to show what seems to be a naked posterior about the size of a planet. He then proceeds to repeatedly spank said posterior as a means of retaliation against these so-called fans. No words would describe the horrid nature of this call to arms other than absolute chaos. The sight of an obese African-American man mooning the audiences as he strikes his own ass might be unbearable and yet comical at the same time. Once I saw that very clip, I couldn’t stop laughing. It’s almost as hilarious as farting on camera following a brief description of bathroom etiquette at your place of employment. And that’s the thing with EDP. He’ll announce stuff without any sense of provocation. There was one video where he talked about one incident where his left leg fell numb following a brief period of self-gratification, i.e. masturbation.

I never thought anyone like this exactly exists, but then I was reminded of another obese moron who made an ass out of himself on camera for the whole world to see. Yes, it has been confirmed by me that Bryant Moreland, EatDatPussy445, has become the next Christian Weston Chandler, otherwise known as Chris-Chan. Like Chris-Chan, EDP is extremely fat, and I’m not talking a little husky. This guy is big enough to land a man-sized probe between the crack of his ass. Also like Chris-Chan, EDP is known to act obligatory toward his audience where he just throws a tandem bitch fit over trivial issues. And let’s not forget that he still lives at home with  a parental figure with no means of income and he has proven to have a massive ego that’s just about as large as his girth, if not bigger.

All in all, EatDatPussy445 is just another laughable idiot. Everything he says and does is just fun. And I don’t recommend anyone going after this guy. He doesn’t really deserve it.

 

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Need I insert a big sigh right now? It seems that we as a society has gone full retard here; I mean we have a bunch of whiney little assholes who want to claim superiority over everything. Ain’t that crazy? I’m talking about these so-called social justice warriors who think they’re standing against oppression but they’re just acting like a bunch of immature little brats, shouting obscene comments without any sense of logic, arguing bullshit, and they don’t even know how to shut up. These social justice warriors have become quite infamous for their idiotic, childish behavior which they’ve brought upon themselves. Social justice warriors give out death threats, vandalize property, demand equal rights, display absolute hatred toward their fellow men, disrupt people with a different opinion, act rude to almost everyone for no apparent reason, and they try to enforce their beliefs onto others. But that’s only the tip of the iceberg. Let’s start off with what it means to be a social justice warrior.

The term of social justice warrior, according to Wikipedia, refers an individual who promotes social progression such as “feminism, civil rights, multiculturalism”, and political identification. According to the Urban Dictionary, social justice warriors, or SJWs, are people with “paper thin skin who always find something to be offended about.” They’re usually young adults whose mentality is somewhat reactionary with little to no knowledge of certain principles such as politics,  entertainment, psychology, economy, and social science. Now, let’s talk about how rude they can be. If you are to offer up your viewpoint on societal issues such as feminism or gender equality, these SJWs would proceed to counter your argument by cussing you out. Typical thing for such bratty behavior, am I correct? You can try and explain your logic towards these people, but they’ll think you’re being an oppressor. Most of their favorite insults would include such terms as racist, misogynistic, homophobic, and rapist. I mean by God, can’t these people come up with better insults? Personally, I really think it sounds a bit too hypocritical in a sense that these social justice warriors are spreading hatred when they should be fighting against it. I would like to talk about the personality of SJW’s altogether, but the problem is they have no personality. The only thing I know about social justice warriors is that they are self-righteous, obnoxious, ignorant morons who refuse to listen to reason and try to claim dominion over equal rights when they actually causing more problems than they could let on. Don’t get me wrong. I am all for equality but these people take their beliefs to the extreme by sending out death threats, as I’ve stated before. They also like to call people out for being misogynistic and sexist over how certain diversities are portrayed in the media; and most of that is directed towards the people who work within the entertainment industry. And I’ll get to that later on.

Another thing I’d like to talk about is that social justice warriors are way too overprotective over how women, gays, and other ethnic groups are portrayed in film, television, video games, comic books, and other forms of media. If you portray a female character as a love interest or a sex symbol, these social justice warriors will throw a fit. If you portray an ethnic person as a bad guy or a secondary character, they’ll throw a fit. If you make a gay person a comic relief character or another secondary character, they will throw a fit. According to a social justice warrior, everything has to be politically correct all the time; in a sense, everything has to go their way, no one else’s. Honestly, I highly doubt that actual feminists, political activists, people from different ethnic groups, and the LGBT would condone this sort of behavior. As I said before, I am all for equal rights and there’s nothing wrong with that. In fact, I support feminism, I support gay rights, I support diversity, and I support equality. However, I cannot stand these idiotic social justice warriors who claim they’re fighting for change when in reality, they’re only screwing things up with their senseless banter over wanting to be treated equal. They yell at authoritarian figures, they cuss out political speakers just because they have a different perspective on society which sounds more intelligent than what SJW’s preach, and they call anyone who is a Caucasian, heterosexual male a misogynistic, racist, homophobic rapist. Let’s not forget that they send death threats to people who work within the entertainment industry, especially the game industry. I mean, seriously?! What kind of person who calls video game developers sexist over the design of a female character? What kind of person who accuses the music industry for objectifying women and then refer to it as rape culture? And lastly, what kind of person would send death threats to a comic book publication company over a simple comic book cover? Why these social justice warriors haven’t been banned from the internet and public gatherings is beyond me. The system is doing a really shitty job at what they do and I don’t know why social justice warriors continue to be around. Everyone is tired of their pointless banter and SJW’s don’t even stand for actual social issues in the world.

And let’s not forget about the hypocrisy of these so-called SJW’s. For instance, there was this social justice warrior dubbed Triggly Puff who attended a speaking event about free speech and throughout the entire event, she heckled the presenter, claiming that he or she was promoting hate speech. During her little banter, this special snowflake got called out for her idiotic behavior when she demanded to not be treated like children and the irony of this ordeal was that she was acting like a child. Now here’s where hypocrisy plays into effect when it was revealed that Triggly Puff is a radical leftist who believes in anti-capitalism, Anarcho-communism, feminism, and body positivity. But this is one individual, so let’s not assume that all SJW’s are obnoxious, idiotic nutjobs who like to present themselves in the most asinine way possible. Oh wait, most of them are like that. But why do they act like a bunch of immature children? Could it be that these people never received any maternal attention from their parents? You know that almost sounds like it’s the case with these people. Why else would they act like a bunch of spoiled brats who demand everyone to follow their orders?

According to an article by Laura Perrins of The Conservative Woman, the National Institute of Child Health and Development conducted studies in April of 2001, linking “non-maternal care for young children” to “aggressive behavior”. She even stated that  the “current college generation” in the 90’s where daycare has been prevalent around that time period. So, I guess it’s safe to say that these social justice warriors are practically overgrown toddlers who just want attention. Then again, I suppose that’s almost every millennial nowadays.

Now honestly, I would say that these social justice warriors would chicken out after somebody calls them out for their bullshit because they’re nothing but a bunch of whiny pansies who can’t accept constructive criticism. The point of constructive criticism is to help someone, not hurt him or her; however, a social justice warrior wouldn’t know the difference between constructive criticism and outright bashing. In fact, they will act like a crybaby over the simplest degree of criticism, especially if it’s meant to help them improve on how they act towards others. I know a bunch of people who act more like adults than these people. Hell, I have a 12-year-old niece as well as a 9-year-old cousin who are more mature than these SJW’s and I don’t feel guilty about saying that. Social justice warriors are basically nothing but a bunch of rude, obnoxious, ungrateful brats who need to leave the internet and never come back or at least until they have straightened their attitudes as well as being accepting of tolerance. That’s all I can say about these people.

Work Cited

http://www.conservativewoman.co.uk/laura-perrins-daycare-generation-are-now-the-students-throwing-tantrums-over-safe-spaces/

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Social_justice_warrior

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=social%20justice%20warrior

 

It’s 2016 and I thought I could try to maintain control over my depression but it will always find a way to creep up behind me. I don’t know how long I can keep up this fight and I feel as though as I am losing control. I am keeping things bottled up but the depression will keep coming back and I will fall back into my old habits of sell-hate and thoughts of suicide. So far, I haven’t attempted to cut myself but I attempted to chop my hands off when my new Flipz headphones stopped working. I thought it was because I destroy everything I touch.

I am still trying to fight off these urges of harming myself even though I made my New Years’ Resolution to try and rid myself of my depression forever. That’s why I’m going to therapy next  month. When I talk to my therapist, who is named Lisa, I tell her that I have been battling depression since I was a teenager and it has gotten worse as I grow; I’ll say that I have attempted to harm myself on occasions where things don’t go my way and I couldn’t handle it.

I might even have to go to a preacher to confess about my failed suicide attempts which landed me in the hospital on a few occasions. I might even say that I believe that depression is a demon, since I think it could be a demon in a sense.

What I am saying is that I need help with my battle with depression.

Here is my year in review. Over the course of this year, I have been through an endless series of misfortune and there were times in which I wanted to end my suffering. Ever since the start of the year, I was plagued with bad luck throughout and my depression started to get the best of me. There were moments in which I wanted to take my life because I didn’t feel I was worthy enough to live. I felt as though I didn’t deserve to live.
As I said, there have been several incidents in which I wanted to kill myself; for instance, on March 13, 2015, I tried to commit suicide by attempting to get myself run over by a moving car and I was escorted to the hospital via police cruiser. That was just the tip of the iceberg, I even posted about my incident a week later, stating that the devil wanted me to take my life so that I can reunite with my late friend, Charlotte, in hell.
And if you think that was bad enough, I have had a difficult time trying to adjust to college. I had financial issues that needed to be paid, I had to get my grades up in order to keep my Financial Aid, and I was swindled out of money that I don’t actually have.
I was friend zoned by my crush, most of my friends are getting married, having babies, and living good lives; I’m still going to a community college via public transportation and I still can’t keep my head above water. I’m 24 years old, I still live my mother, I have no wife, no girlfriend, and I have no job.
However, there were some good things that came out of this year. I have attended to the Phoenix Comic Con for three days, I even got to meet other cosplayers who liked to play dress up, and I even got a few good stuff.
Nevertheless, I still have battles with my depression and there were even times where I contemplated suicidal hater for myself; I even tried attempting suicide on several occasions. I thought about cutting myself with an exacter knife each morning or I thought about hanging myself on the bridge in Wellton. I had to watch a lot of suicide stories to dissuade myself from going through with my attempts.
That’s when I realized that there are other people just like me who are faced with this problem, especially on social media sites like Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram. I have been getting messages from bloggers on WordPress about my articles and some have been inspirational since these were people who have gone through the same thing I’ve been through.
This was by far the most difficult thing I ever did, writing about my attempted suicides and my thoughts on attempting suicide. I thought that I was going to get in trouble for speaking my mind but what I am doing is being brave for all of you who suffer from clinical depression, just like me.
In closing, 2015 was an unfortunate year for me and I am hoping that 2016 would be better. Here’s to a Happy New Year.

I know the holiday season is supposed to be a time of joy, but I am still depressed. I’m just so very tired. My family pisses me off on Christmas every year and I don’t know why. They have been so great to me all those years and I am still not happy. This year was a terrible year for me because my depression got the best of me; I have attempted suicide three times this year. And out of those three attempts, two have landed me in the hospital. And now it’s Christmas and I still have these running thoughts of taking my life; yet I don’t know why I am feeling this way. I’m supposed to be happy on Christmas but I’m not. Instead of sugarplums dancing in my head, I have thoughts of my lifeless body dangling at the end of the rope. I don’t want to feel this way anymore. I can’t feel this way, not around Christmas.

This was the hardest thing for me to say because I am trying my best but it’s just not enough. I think there’s something wrong with me and I need help.

I am writing this because there are more people who are faced with holiday blues who live in pain, especially during this time of year. They say Christmas is the most wonderful time of the year, but it’s actually the most depressing time because there are still people out there who are faced with mental illnesses that prevent them from enjoying time with their family and friends. They shut everybody out for no reason because their depression becomes worse and they want to end their lives, just like me.

Imagine on Christmas morning when your parents call your name to open presents but you don’t answer because you’ve ended your life on Christmas Eve. They walk into your room only to find your lifeless body at the foot of the bed, or dangling from the ceiling, or with slits at your wrist, or a bullet hole in your head. Their Christmas morning has turned into a day of mourning. Imagine your family having to sell all their Christmas presents just to pay for your funeral, imagine your family crying endlessly every year because Christmas will not be the same without you and you know it. The holiday spirit will never come back, no more Christmas trees, no more presents, no more family dinners because you’re dead.

If you knew what it was like, then you would see why I am writing this. I have faced depression all year and it has gotten to the point where I attempted suicide twice. I pretended to be happy, I even tricked myself to feel this way. And I am not alone, there are others like me. So I have decided to write this blog, especially on Christmas, because I am trying to reach out to other people who is faced with suicidal depression. These people need me to help them in the right path. My life is too precious and I am not going to take it way. I am not going to make the same mistake again. I am going to fight this for all of you.

Everything will be alright. You just have to believe it. It’s never too late to turn things around. There is still hope. We just need to open up our hearts and let it come in.

Have you ever felt like you’re alone, like nobody cared about you? You sit on your computer just typing your darkest thoughts, contemplating over the bad things that have happened to you in the past, keeping your emotions bottled up.

I want to tell you a story. There was this young man, we’ll call him Henry. Henry had a great life, a loving family, and he had friends who cared about him. He was very thankful for the life he’s been given. He was practically the happiest person in the world. However, that happiness didn’t last.

When Henry was young, his grandmother passed away after suffering a heart attack from smoking. He was devastated by this turn of events. He grew more and more resentful at the people around him. He misbehaved in school, got in trouble with the teacher, and he was sent to the principal’s office. He felt that no one liked him, he was all alone.

Years later, he was in high school and he was on medication. Henry did manage to make it through all his classes without any complaints and he managed to talk to people. He made several friends in high school. However, the depression got to him in later years. There were moments in which Henry feels isolated and alone. There were even times where Henry wanted to end his life. In his sophomore year in high school, Henry had a crush on this girl. Let’s call her Emma. Henry liked Emma a lot but Emma only liked Henry as just a friend. Again the feelings of loneliness surfaced and Henry became deeply depressed. Henry was in love with Emma but she only thought of him as just a friend. He felt as though his heart was breaking. Even though he acted as though it didn’t matter, Henry still felt the feeling of loneliness each day. Every time he saw Emma talking to other guys, Henry felt left out. He was convinced that she never really liked him at all, like she never cared if he lived or died. So, Henry thought about committing suicide.

“Why not?”, he asked. “It’s not like anybody likes me. Maybe I should just kill myself.”

Henry has been given several opportunities to take his own life. He could climb atop to roof of the gymnasium and plunge to his death in front of the whole school. He took take a knife from his mom’s kitchen drawer and slit his wrists. He could take a handful of pills with a bottle of liquor. Every chance he gets, he could end right then and there. He was ready to die. Because he didn’t want to feel the pain anymore. He didn’t want to feel sad anymore. He just wanted to end his suffering forever.

“All I want is for this pain to go away,” he says to himself.

He wants to bring an end to his agony, to silence his shame. So, Henry went onto his computer to write his final goodbyes to all his friends on Facebook. He was done. He wanted it to be over.

Days later, Henry’s Facebook page blew up with messages of endearment.

“I feel your pain, dude. Just know that it gets better.”

“Don’t kill yourself, Henry. You have so much to offer this world.”

Henry scrolled down to reach each comment until he came across one written by Emma.

“Henry, my mom told me that you’re trying to kill yourself. Please, don’t do it. I know I haven’t been much of a good friend to you. I was so busy with school and work that I didn’t pay much attention. I feel terrible for the way I mistreated you. That wasn’t my intention to ignore you and your pain. Of all the people I’ve talked to, you’re practically the only one who actually listens. You are smart, kind, and you are beautiful, Henry. I have hung out with a lot of people and you were the nicest person I have met. You should never give up on life. There are so many people who care so much about you and they would be so sad to see you go. And so would I. You mean everything to me, Henry. I once told you that I liked you as a friend but now I know that you’re more than just a friend. You’re my family and I love you so very much. You see, Henry? You’re not alone. You never were. And don’t think that you’re not worthy because you are. So, if you need a friend to talk to, you can always come to me. I’m going to help you get through this so you don’t have to be alone.”

The next day, Henry noticed Emma looking directly at him. She smiled and waved. She looked to her friends and bid them farewell before she headed into his direction. Emma walked up to Henry and gave him a great big hug. She even kissed him on the cheek.

Henry knew that he will never have to be alone anymore.

“My friends and I are going to catch a movie later tonight. You wanna come?,” Emma asked Henry.

Henry looked at Emma with a smile on his face and said, “Hell yes.”

Henry and Emma walked to class together, hand in hand.

The moral of the story is there are people who care deeply about you, especially the ones who you care deeply about. You should never give up hope that the person that you like will like you back. When you open up to people, they open up to you. Life will get better. You just need to believe.

“It’s hopeless. I try so hard to do my best but I only make things worse. I cannot take anymore of this pressure. I just want out. I just want to be free. Free from all the misery, free from all my pain, free from all my suffering. Nothing I do makes a difference. I am just a screw up. I never get things right. I never learn anything. It’s all for nothing. I am worthless. Maybe I should end it here.”

Those are the words of a person who suffers from suicidal tendencies. It really hurts me just to see young people go through these extremes just because they think their lives are worthless. This is a very big issue and we need to open our eyes. More people are dying from suicide than gun violence and disease altogether. While everybody is busy ranting on about the election, or the Iranian nuclear deal, or even the climate change, there is one person who has claimed his or her life because they wanted just to be noticed. Well, they got noticed alright! Their names are in the newspaper in the obituaries. And nothing will change that.

I have been thinking about this. Now I know how sad and depressing life can be. I have my moments of feeling worthless. I have been friendzoned by my crush, I rarely talk to my family often, and school is becoming too hard for me. Yeah, I have had my problems and I still do. Each morning, I play it off like it’s no big deal but I keep fighting these demons when the thoughts provoke me. I have acted as though no cared about me that I was useless and there was no future for me. I told about my recent suicide attempt on March 13, 2015. I even considered a second attempt at suicide on August 7, 2015 when I tried to cut myself in my mom’s shower with one of her razors. I fought the urge to go through with it and I realized that I needed help. So I contacted the suicide prevention hotline and talked to the people who worked there. I cried so hard while I was on the line. They told me that I needed to let it all out. I was scared because I thought they said they were going to send the cops over to my house and my mom was on her way to take me to my doctor’s office to pick up my prescription.

Right now, at this very moment, I have been watching this video on suicide stories. There’s this particular one that got me thinking my world will not be the same if I’m gone. My mother would have to force herself to go to work just pay for my funeral, my friend Becca would have to give up her pageant career because she could not bear the fact that she would not see me again, my brother would not be strong anymore, my sister would have to quit her job because she would not carry on through the pain. All the people I went to high school with would also go to counseling for suicide prevention because they don’t want what would have happened to me to happen to them. They needed me more than I needed them. I would have realized this but I was too upset. And when I’m gone, their lives would be empty and meaningless. They would become worthless without me. This is something that we should all think about.

We need to realize that suicide is not the answer. It’s not taking your pain away, it’s giving it to everyone else around you. The emotional toll is unbearable because you’re gone and nothing can change that. Families and friends will blame themselves for your suicide, they will lose their way as you did. Even the person you love will try to take his or her life just because the guilt of not having you in his or her life would be unbearable. The pain would be too real and it would not go away.

If you feel like you want to kill yourself, stop. It’s not worth it. Think this through and take a step back. Reach out to someone who understands your pain. Talk to your family, talk to your friends, contact your local suicide hotline, and speak to a professional. It doesn’t hurt just to ask for help.

You are not worthless, you are worth it.

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